I have decided to put aside my book and probably not pick it up again. It got better as I went along, but it was really not engaging.
Our church is currently doing a study on 1 Samuel, so I have decided to go along with it to continue my Judges study from last summer and fall. It was a kind of depressing ending, moving on to the era of the kings would be good. Only problem is that I think that Dave is going to be moving through them rather quickly, so I may not be able to keep up. I have made it through to Chapter 5 so far, averaging a chapter a day, but it has been late night, forced reading and I know that I am not getting much out of it.
I have been so busy trying to run a side business (which has made zero profit) and trying to get ready for my maternity leave that I have not made the time to really spend with the Lord; studying his word and praying.
I have not totally neglected my faith, as I said before, I read for 5 minutes or so every night and go through my prayer cards, but that's it.
I just have so much on my mind lately that I don't feel like I can give the time the Lord deserves. I have very little self discipline. I say that I am going to do my QT when Emmett goes to bed, which is early enough for me to be coherent, but then I go off and do something else, lately it has been preparing for maternity leave. I am actually making video screencast tutorials to walk them through how to use photoshop, which I figured I could sell when they are all finished, but that means that I want them to be really high quality, and they are taking a lot of my time.
On top of that, my due date is approaching and I start to fear and wonder what would happen if I delivered early...I would have zero time to work on these tutorials and would have to find something entirely different to do.
So, that is the pressure that I am feeling and part of the reason that I feel my faith is on the back burner right now.
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